No More RESTaurants

Going out to eat with a two year old is not the definition of relaxing.
We don't go to places where they give you one of those buzzers and have to wait for a table. It just doesn't work. When we do go out for dinner, it usually starts out okay. I pack some sort of toy/gadget with us and also some crackers to tie her over before the food comes.
However, this usually only buys us five to ten minutes.
The first few minutes after sitting down are usually pretty easygoing. Emmy likes the crayons for about two minutes, but then prefers to either chew on them or throw them off the table. The rest of the time is spent chasing her throughout the restaurant. By the time we actually get our food, we are pretty exhausted after running the equivalent of a 10k.
We always wonder what is better – to order her food right when we get there or wait until we all order. The thing with ordering food for her right away is that she is done by the time we get our food, so one of us usually spends time chasing her around the restaurant while our food gets cold. However, if we wait until we order, while this option works well, we rarely enjoy our food as we spend most of the time cutting her food and making sure she isn’t throwing the salt & pepper shakers across the table.
Between shoveling food in my mouth, trying to contribute to the conversation at the table, and testing my hand-eye coordination with anything in Emmy's reach, I somehow manage to eat the food on my plate and not even remember it.

When Brad and I were single diners, we promised that when we had kids we would never be one of those parents who had screaming kids at a restaurant...and now look at us. We're one of them!
I've told some of our friends who have children under the age of one to take advantage of relaxing meals out, because everything changes when they get mobile. They have no idea.
We still take Emmy & Erin out to eat, but we have now realized a few things:

1.) We try to be strict about the window of time we have to eat.
2.) We try to keep it somewhere kid-friendly. The Lookout gives kids a balloon and they also have a giant playground in the back patio which Emmy absolutely loves. However, she is still a bit too small for some of it and we still end up chasing her around/helping her up the stairs.
3.) Quick service is essential. Long wait = cranky child = throwing things = crayons are taken away = cranky child = cranky parents = not a relaxing meal.
4.) Bring snacks.

For those of you who don’t have kids yet, savor those coffee dates, relax with a drink at happy hour, and appreciate meaningful and quality conversation. For us, we have found that we much prefer to just keep our meals relaxed and at home.